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Ask to review_including grammar check and typo

With my experience as a KOICA’s volunteer, I became more interested in development cooperation and the international community. While seeing and experiencing the local situations in developing country, I felt only sorry at the first time, but I found myself constantly thinking about activities to improve the level of public health and medical services. I thought it would be good to make the environment where everyone can be provided equally, at least, in these area. I would like to work at the KOFIH for contributing them, which is mainly in charge of development cooperation in the health and medical field of North Korea and many developing countries on behalf of our country. I had some work experiences in public offices for almost 5 years and kept trying to develop my abilities related to development cooperation through the participating volunteering and classes. I will not only enhance KOFIH's core values, but also develop my own capabilities with my sincerity. Thank you.

Alongside with my experience as a KOICA’s volunteer, I became much more interested in the development and cooperation with the international community.  As I've witnessed and experienced (While seeing and experiencing) the local situations in developing country, I felt only distressed/concerened/symphathetic (sorry) at the first time. I found myself constantly thinking about the  activities to improve the level of public health and medical services. I thought it would be good to make the environment where everyone can be provided equally, at least, in these area. I would like to work at the KOFIH to contribute to them, in which is mainly in-charge of development and cooperation in the health and medical field of North Korea and many developing countries, in behalf of our country. I had some work experiences in public offices for almost 5 years and I kept trying to develop my abilities in relation to development and cooperation through participating as a volunteer and attending classes. I will not only enhance KOFIH's core values, but also develop with my own capabilities sincerely. ( or I will not only enhance KOFIH's core values but also to share the same passion and beliefs that I held for so many years.) Thank you.


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