영작교정
목록
완료

Homework

There are five members in my family; grandmother, father, mother, younger brother and me. My grandmother is very kind and loves others, so she used to do a volunteer work at hospitals. But since she can't walk well now, she tends a small vegetable garden where pepper, garlic and lettuce are growing in. My parents run a family business, relating the stone. They are customising the original size of stones in terms of size and shape to meet their customers' needs. I think my dad is the standard of father in Korea as he is really diligent and puntual. He is working so hard for us. Also, my mom is a workaholic. She is the last one who leaves the office and that makes me feel proud of her but quite worried at the sametime. My brother is two years younger than me and he works at my parents' company. He started his own business with his best friend last year as a side job. It's a karaoke for one person or small group of people and this business is very popular.

I'm now a job seeker so I spend most of my time looking an online job site, writing a resume and applying. I prefer a job which I can take an advantage of my major and suits my personality. I could describe my personality with some adjectives; cheerful, positive and people-oriented. There is a saying that smiles are started by another smile. So I always try to smile. I love travelling and I've visited lots of countries including Malta, England and Croatia. The best place was definitely Italy. As Italy is known for the beautiful and romantic country, I enjoyed the architecture, food and mood there.

There are five members in my family; grandmother, father, mother, younger brother and me. My grandmother is very kind and loves others, so she used to do a volunteer work at hospitals. But since she can't walk well now, she tends a small vegetable garden where pepper, garlic and lettuce are growing in. My parents run a family business, relating the stone. They are customising the original size of stones in terms of size and shape to meet their customers' needs. I think my dad is the standard of father in Korea as he is really diligent and puntual. He is working so hard for us. Also, my mom is a workaholic. She is the last one who leaves the office and that makes me feel proud of her but quite worried at the sametime. My brother is two years younger than me and he works at my parents' company. He started his own business with his best friend last year as a side job. It's a karaoke for one person or small group of people and this business is very popular.

I'm now a job seeker so I spend most of my time looking an online job site, writing a resume and applying. I prefer a job which I can take an advantage of my major and suits my personality. I could describe my personality with some adjectives; cheerful, positive and people-oriented. There is a saying that smiles are started by another smile. So I always try to smile. I love travelling and I've visited lots of countries including Malta, England and Croatia. The best place was definitely Italy. As Italy is known for the beautiful and romantic country, I enjoyed the architecture, food and mood there.

Hi Janice, I made some slight modification in your composition,overall it's a good one :

There are five members in my family; grandmother, father, mother, younger brother and me. My grandmother is very kind and loves others, so she used to do a volunteer work at hospitals. But since she can't walk well now, she tends a small vegetable garden where pepper, garlic and lettuce are growing in. My parents run a family business, customizing stones. They are customizing the original size of stones in terms of size and shape to meet their customers' needs. I think my dad is an epitome of a typical father in Korea as he is really diligent and punctual. He works so hard for us. Also, my mom is a workaholic. She is the last one who leaves the office and that makes me feel proud of her but quite worried at the same time. My brother is two years younger than me and he works at my parents' company. He started his own business with his best friend last year as another job on the side to augment his income. They set up a karaoke room for one person or a small group of people and this business is very popular.

I'm now a job seeker so I spend most of my time looking for jobs online, writing and updating my resume keep me occupied. I prefer a job which I can take an advantage of my major and one that suits my personality. I could describe my personality with some adjectives; cheerful, positive and people-oriented. There is a saying that smiles starts from another smile. So I always try to smile. I love travelling and I've visited lots of countries including Malta, England and Croatia. The best place was definitely Italy. As Italy is known for beauty and romance, I enjoyed the architecture, food and mood of this country. It has made me a hopeless romantic.


수강정보
필리핀 화상영어 주 5회 30분 4주
튜터
Maribel
교재
New OPIc SOS
[시니어] 어학시험 OPIC
번호
제목
작성자
튜터
작성일
572
완료
[6번째 영작 첨삭] writing (STEP#1 )
Anna
-
2017.10.04
571
완료
[5번째 영작 첨삭] writing (Project Idea #3 #4)
Anna
-
2017.10.04
570
완료
[4번째 영작 첨삭] writing (Project Idea #2)
Anna
-
2017.10.04
569
완료
[3번째 영작 첨삭] writing (Project Idea #1)
Anna
-
2017.10.04
568
완료
[3번째 영작 첨삭] ask to correct my coverletter_3
Euna
-
2017.09.22
567
완료
[2번째 영작 첨삭] ask to correct my coverletter_2
Euna
-
2017.09.22
566
완료
[1번째 영작 첨삭] ask to correct my coverletter_1
Euna
-
2017.09.22
565
완료
[2번째 영작 첨삭] writting 9/21
sue
-
2017.09.21
564
완료
[1번째 영작 첨삭] hi Ayumi!
sue
-
2017.09.20
563
완료
[2번째 영작 첨삭] working
Kyuri
-
2017.09.14
562
완료
[1번째 영작 첨삭] blind date
Kyuri
-
2017.09.05
561
완료
[2번째 영작 첨삭] Essay
Janice
Maribel
2017.08.23
560
완료
[1번째 영작 첨삭] Homework
Janice
Maribel
2017.08.22
559
완료
[14번째 영작 첨삭] English Practice 13
Gina
-
2017.08.03
558
완료
[13번째 영작 첨삭] English Practice 12
Gina
-
2017.08.03
557
완료
[12번째 영작 첨삭] English Practice 11, 12
Gina
-
2017.08.03
556
완료
[9번째 영작 첨삭] feedback
suzy kim
Maribel
2017.08.03
555
완료
[8번째 영작 첨삭] feedback
suzy kim
Maribel
2017.08.03
554
완료
[7번째 영작 첨삭] feedback
suzy kim
Maribel
2017.08.02
553
완료
[6번째 영작 첨삭] feedback
suzy kim
Maribel
2017.08.02

초대한 친구가 수업을 등록하면
무료 수업 1회를 드려요!

무료 수업 1회
초대한 친구가 회원 가입 및 수강권 결제 후 수업을 등록하면
두 사람 모두 무료 수업 1회 수강권을 받아요!
Step 01. 조이영어로 친구를 초대해 보세요!
https://joy05.co.kr
Step 02. 인증하기
초대한 친구가 수업 등록을 완료하면, 고객센터로 수업을 등록한 친구의 '아이디' 또는 '이름 + 휴대폰 번호 뒷자리'를 남겨주세요!
*자녀 혹은 학부모 이름으로 가입하신 경우, 실제 회원가입하신 수강생 이름으로 적어주세요!
Ex. 친구 아이디: joy5205 / 친구 이름: 김조이, 9876
Step 03. 혜택받기
고객센터를 통해 인증하신 내용이 확인되면, 혜택을 적용해드립니다!

Zoom 화상수업 가이드

1. Zoom 설치하기
아래 링크에 접속하여 Zoom 프로그램을 설치합니다.
2. 수강실 입장하기
1) 조이영어 홈페이지 로그인 후 강의실에서 [수강실 입장] 버튼을 클릭해주세요.
2) 버튼을 누르고 Zoom 프로그램 열기 허용 → 컴퓨터 오디오로 참가를 누르면 튜터와 연결됩니다.
3. Zoom 이용에 다른 문의사항이 있으신가요?
조이영어 학습매니저에게 연락주시면 수업에 관련된 문의사항을 친절히 상담해드리겠습니다.
  • 카카오톡 상담 채널 : @조이영어
  • 조이영어 고객센터 : 1899-8695 (운영시간 : 월~금 9:00~17:30)

이용약관

개인정보취급방침