영작교정
목록
완료

6/24

While I was just waiting for our laundry and my English class at a cafe with my mom, I answered my tutor's phone call. I told her that I'm nervous because I'm going to fencing tomorrow. We started talking about kendo and swordsmen. I told her kendo is a Japanese sport. She also taught me about Philippine stick fighting. After class, I asked my mom to search for it. This way, I could learn about Arnis, Kali, and Eskrima, Filipino martial arts (kendo) with bastons made of rattan sticks.

While I was just waiting for our laundry and my English class at a cafe with my mom, I answered my tutor's phone call. I told her that I'm nervous because I'm going to fencing tomorrow. We started talking about kendo and swordsmen. I told her kendo is a Japanese sport. She also taught me about Philippine stick fighting. After class, I asked my mom to search for it. This way, I could learn about Arnis, Kali, and Eskrima, Filipino martial arts (kendo) with bastons made of rattan sticks.
====================================================================================================================================================

Here are the corrections:

  1. Original:
    While I was just waiting for our laundry and my English class at a cafe with my mom, I answered my tutor's phone call.
    Corrected:
    While I was waiting for our laundry and my English class at a café with my mom, I answered a phone call from my tutor.
    Explanation:

  • “Just” is unnecessary here and can be removed for clarity.

  • "Café" is the correct spelling (with accent).

  • "My tutor's phone call" is awkward → better: “a phone call from my tutor.”


  1. Original:
    I told her that I'm nervous because I'm going to fencing tomorrow.
    Corrected:
    I told her that I was nervous because I was going fencing the next day.
    Explanation:

  • Use past tense (“was nervous,” “was going”) to match the reporting verb “told.”

  • "Going to fencing" → incorrect; say “going fencing” (no “to”).

  • “Tomorrow” should become “the next day” in reported speech.


  1. Original:
    We started talking about kendo and swordsmen.
    Corrected:
    We started talking about kendo and swordsmen.
    Explanation:
    ✔️ This sentence is already correct.


  1. Original:
    I told her kendo is a Japanese sport.
    Corrected:
    I told her that kendo is a Japanese sport.
    Explanation:

  • Add “that” for smoother sentence flow, especially in formal or written English.


  1. Original:
    She also taught me about Philippine stick fighting.
    Corrected:
    She also taught me about Philippine stick fighting.
    Explanation:
    ✔️ This sentence is correct as is.


  1. Original:
    After class, I asked my mom to search for it.
    Corrected:
    After class, I asked my mom to look it up.
    Explanation:

  • “Look it up” is the natural expression when referring to searching online or finding information.

  • "Search for it" is understandable but less natural in this context.


  1. Original:
    This way, I could learn about Arnis, Kali, and Eskrima, Filipino martial arts (kendo) with bastons made of rattan sticks.
    Corrected:
    That way, I could learn about Arnis, Kali, and Eskrima—Filipino martial arts that use bastons made of rattan sticks.
    Explanation:

  • “This way” → better changed to “That way” to match past tense.

  • Use an em dash (—) for better structure and clarification.

  • "(kendo)" is incorrect and misleading. Kendo is Japanese, not Filipino. Removed for accuracy.


Final Edited Text:

While I was waiting for our laundry and my English class at a café with my mom, I answered a phone call from my tutor. I told her that I was nervous because I was going fencing the next day. We started talking about kendo and swordsmen. I told her that kendo is a Japanese sport. She also taught me about Philippine stick fighting. After class, I asked my mom to look it up. That way, I could learn about Arnis, Kali, and Eskrima - Filipino martial arts that use bastons made of rattan sticks.


수강정보
필리핀 전화영어 주 2회 10분 24주
튜터
Anna
교재
Hand in Hand 4
[주니어] 정규
번호
제목
작성자
튜터
작성일
172
완료
[32번째 영작 첨삭] Angelina Jolie
clair
-
2015.05.01
171
완료
[3번째 영작 첨삭] 3rd homework :)
Yuri Choi
-
2015.05.01
170
완료
[2번째 영작 첨삭] 2nd Homework :)
Yuri Choi
-
2015.05.01
169
완료
[2번째 영작 첨삭] Hi jen
LUCY
-
2015.04.30
168
완료
[1번째 영작 첨삭] first homework :)
Yuri Choi
-
2015.04.29
167
완료
[1번째 영작 첨삭] shasha.
-
-
2015.04.29
166
완료
[1번째 영작 첨삭] traffic accidents
Melissa
-
2015.04.28
165
완료
[1번째 영작 첨삭] some questions to final interview
LUCY
-
2015.04.28
164
완료
[2번째 영작 첨삭] child experience
Jang Eunheon
Charm
2015.04.27
163
완료
[31번째 영작 첨삭] Mother scold Her Kids' bad behavior on Facebook
clair
-
2015.04.27
162
완료
[30번째 영작 첨삭] Blind university student make molecular structure with 3D printer.
clair
-
2015.04.27
161
완료
[19번째 영작 첨삭] lesson 7 example -2
lee hye eun
-
2015.04.26
160
완료
[18번째 영작 첨삭] lesson 7 example -1
lee hye eun
-
2015.04.26
159
완료
[1번째 영작 첨삭] studying English for me
River kim
-
2015.04.25
158
완료
[3번째 영작 첨삭] I miss you charm
Victoria Jeong
Charm
2015.04.24
157
완료
[4번째 영작 첨삭] My diary1
PARK NA HAE
-
2015.04.23
156
완료
[8번째 영작 첨삭] 2015-04-22 (question!)
KIM YU HEE
-
2015.04.22
155
완료
[1번째 영작 첨삭] Reference
Jang Eunheon
Charm
2015.04.22
154
완료
[1번째 영작 첨삭] some questions
KOKANGMIN
-
2015.04.21
153
완료
[3번째 영작 첨삭] Review for writing3
PARK NA HAE
-
2015.04.21

초대한 친구가 수업을 등록하면
무료 수업 1회를 드려요!

무료 수업 1회
초대한 친구가 회원 가입 및 수강권 결제 후 수업을 등록하면
두 사람 모두 무료 수업 1회 수강권을 받아요!
Step 01. 조이영어로 친구를 초대해 보세요!
https://joy05.co.kr
Step 02. 인증하기
초대한 친구가 수업 등록을 완료하면, 고객센터로 수업을 등록한 친구의 '아이디' 또는 '이름 + 휴대폰 번호 뒷자리'를 남겨주세요!
*자녀 혹은 학부모 이름으로 가입하신 경우, 실제 회원가입하신 수강생 이름으로 적어주세요!
Ex. 친구 아이디: joy5205 / 친구 이름: 김조이, 9876
Step 03. 혜택받기
고객센터를 통해 인증하신 내용이 확인되면, 혜택을 적용해드립니다!

Zoom 화상수업 가이드

1. Zoom 설치하기
아래 링크에 접속하여 Zoom 프로그램을 설치합니다.
2. 수강실 입장하기
1) 조이영어 홈페이지 로그인 후 강의실에서 [수강실 입장] 버튼을 클릭해주세요.
2) 버튼을 누르고 Zoom 프로그램 열기 허용 → 컴퓨터 오디오로 참가를 누르면 튜터와 연결됩니다.
3. Zoom 이용에 다른 문의사항이 있으신가요?
조이영어 학습매니저에게 연락주시면 수업에 관련된 문의사항을 친절히 상담해드리겠습니다.
  • 카카오톡 상담 채널 : @조이영어
  • 조이영어 고객센터 : 1899-8695 (운영시간 : 월~금 9:00~17:30)

이용약관

개인정보취급방침