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6/20

During my English class yesterday, I wanted to tell Ms. Anna, who is my tutor. "I'm still outside. I came to a cafe in my town with my mom. We'll be out of here in half an hour. We are going to go back to the laundromat to finish doing our laundry." But I couldn't seem to bring myself to speak what I was thinking fluently.

During my English class yesterday, I wanted to tell Ms. Anna, who is my tutor. "I'm still outside. I came to a cafe in my town with my mom. We'll be out of here in half an hour. We are going to go back to the laundromat to?finish doing our laundry." But I couldn't seem to bring myself to speak what I was thinking fluently.
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Here are the corrections:

  1. Original:
    During my English class yesterday, I wanted to tell Ms. Anna, who is my tutor.

    Corrected:
    During my English class yesterday, I wanted to tell Ms. Anna, my tutor, the following:
    Explanation: The sentence is grammatically fine, but adding "the following:" prepares the reader for the message that follows. Also, the phrase "who is my tutor" can be shortened for fluency.

  2. Original:
    "I'm still outside. I came to a cafe in my town with my mom. We'll be out of here in half an hour. We are going to go back to the laundromat to?finish doing our laundry."

    Corrected:
    "I'm still outside. I came to a café in my town with my mom. We'll leave in about half an hour. After that, we're going back to the laundromat to finish our laundry."
    Explanation:

    • "to?finish" has a typo or unclear punctuation — corrected for clarity.

    • "We’ll be out of here" is fine, but "we'll leave" is more concise and natural.

    • "going to go back""we’re going back" is smoother.

    • Added "After that," to clarify sequence.

  3. Original:
    But I couldn't seem to bring myself to speak what I was thinking fluently.

    Corrected:
    But I couldn’t express my thoughts fluently.
    Explanation:

    • "bring myself to speak what I was thinking fluently" is awkward and wordy.

    • "express my thoughts fluently" is more natural and clear.


Final Edited Text:

During my English class yesterday, I wanted to tell Ms. Anna, my tutor, the following:
"I'm still outside. I came to a café in my town with my mom. We'll leave in about half an hour. After that, we're going back to the laundromat to finish our laundry."
But I couldn’t express my thoughts fluently.


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