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2/20

I had baked some madeleine. In a bowl, add 105 g of each sugar, weak flour, and melted butter; two eggs; vanilla; and 3 g of baking powder, and mix well to make the dough. I was able to bake a total of 24 madeleines, repeating the process above twice. I wrapped up some of them for my grandma's birthday gift. Actually, I had to visit school one more time (due to a small mistake on the school side) and handed out some of the rest while I was visiting.

I had baked some madeleine. In a bowl, add 105 g of each sugar, weak flour, and melted butter; two eggs; vanilla; and 3 g of baking powder, and mix well to make the dough. I was able to bake a total of 24 madeleines, repeating the process above twice. I wrapped up some of them for my grandma's birthday gift. Actually, I had to visit school one more time (due to a small mistake on the school side) and handed out some of the rest while I was visiting.

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Here are the corrections:

  1. Original: I had baked some madeleine.
    Corrected: I baked some madeleines.
    Explanation: "Had baked" (past perfect) is unnecessary unless there is another past action it is being compared to. Also, "madeleine" should be plural ("madeleines") since multiple were made.

  2. Original: In a bowl, add 105 g of each sugar, weak flour, and melted butter; two eggs; vanilla; and 3 g of baking powder, and mix well to make the dough.
    Corrected: In a bowl, add 105 g each of sugar, weak flour, and melted butter; two eggs; vanilla; and 3 g of baking powder, then mix well to form the dough.
    Explanation: "Each sugar" is incorrect; "each" should refer to the listed ingredients together, so it should be "105 g each of sugar, weak flour, and melted butter." "Make the dough" is slightly unnatural; "form the dough" sounds more appropriate.

  3. Original: I was able to bake a total of 24 madeleines, repeating the process above twice.
    Corrected: I baked a total of 24 madeleines by repeating the process twice.
    Explanation: "Was able to" is not wrong, but "baked" is more natural and direct. "Above" is unnecessary, as "the process" already refers to the previous instructions.

  4. Original: I wrapped up some of them for my grandma's birthday gift.
    Corrected: I wrapped some as a birthday gift for my grandma.
    Explanation: "Wrapped up" is informal; "wrapped" is sufficient. "Some of them" is a bit wordy; "some" is clearer. "Grandma's birthday gift" sounds slightly unnatural, so rephrasing it to "a birthday gift for my grandma" makes it smoother.

  5. Original: Actually, I had to visit school one more time (due to a small mistake on the school side) and handed out some of the rest while I was visiting.
    Corrected: Actually, I had to visit the school again due to a minor mistake on the school's part and handed out some of the remaining madeleines while I was there.
    Explanation: "One more time" is correct but "again" is more natural. "Small mistake" is fine, but "minor mistake" sounds smoother. "On the school side" is awkward; "on the school's part" is the correct phrasing. "Some of the rest" is unclear; "some of the remaining madeleines" specifies what was handed out. "While I was visiting" is slightly unnatural; "while I was there" is more natural.


Revised Text

I baked some madeleines. In a bowl, add 105 g each of sugar, weak flour, and melted butter; two eggs; vanilla; and 3 g of baking powder, then mix well to form the dough. I baked a total of 24 madeleines by repeating the process twice. I wrapped some as a birthday gift for my grandma.

Actually, I had to visit the school again due to a minor mistake on the school's part and handed out some of the remaining madeleines while I was there.


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