영작교정
목록
완료

Diary

I've reminded of my past through book's topic. Until got married. I was a violin player in orchestra. We had to performance test in front of constructor, older player. It's like promotion test. If we get a higher score, move in front seat. Or not we move in the very end seat. At in worse case If we don't get a standard score,get fired. I always used to stressed. I felt so happy when I do concert other side I was nervous and felt confident. So after get married I quit a there at first.

I've reminded of my past through book's topic. Until got married. I was a violin player in orchestra. We had to performance test in front of constructor, older player. It's like promotion test. If we get a higher score, move in front seat. Or not we move in the very end seat. At in worse case If we don't get a standard score,get fired. I always used to stressed. I felt so happy when I do concert other side I was nervous and felt confident. So after get married I quit a there at first.

===================================================================================================================================

Here are the corrections:

  1. I've reminded of my past through book's topic.
    Correction: I've been reminded of my past through the book's topic.
    Explanation: "I've reminded" is incorrect; it should be "I've been reminded" (passive voice). "Book's topic" should be "the book's topic" for proper article usage.

  2. Until got married.
    Correction: Until I got married...
    Explanation: A subject is needed in this sentence. "Until" should be followed by "I got married" for clarity.

  3. I was a violin player in orchestra.
    Correction: I was a violin player in an orchestra.
    Explanation: "Orchestra" is a singular countable noun, so it needs the article "an."

  4. We had to performance test in front of constructor, older player.
    Correction: We had to take a performance test in front of the conductor and senior players.
    Explanation: "Performance test" needs the verb "take." "Constructor" is incorrect; it should be "conductor." "Older player" should be pluralized as "senior players" for better fluency.

  5. It's like promotion test.
    Correction: It's like a promotion test.
    Explanation: "Promotion test" needs an article ("a").

  6. If we get a higher score, move in front seat.
    Correction: If we get a higher score, we move to the front seat.
    Explanation: "Move" needs a subject ("we"). "In front seat" should be "to the front seat" for correct preposition use.

  7. Or not we move in the very end seat.
    Correction: Otherwise, we move to the very last seat.
    Explanation: "Or not" is awkward; "Otherwise" is more natural. "In the very end seat" should be "to the very last seat" for better wording.

  8. At in worse case If we don't get a standard score, get fired.
    Correction: In the worst case, if we don't get a standard score, we get fired.
    Explanation: "At in worse case" is incorrect; the proper phrase is "In the worst case." A subject ("we") is needed for "get fired."

  9. I always used to stressed.
    Correction: I was always stressed. OR I always used to be stressed.
    Explanation: "Used to stressed" is incorrect; it should be "used to be stressed" or simply "was always stressed."

  10. I felt so happy when I do concert other side I was nervous and felt confident.
    Correction: I felt so happy when I performed in a concert, but at the same time, I was both nervous and confident.
    Explanation: "Do concert" should be "performed in a concert." "Other side" should be "but at the same time" for clarity. "Felt confident" is fine but needs to be included properly in the sentence structure.

  11. So after get married I quit a there at first.
    Correction: So after getting married, I quit the orchestra.
    Explanation: "After get married" should be "after getting married" (gerund form). "A there" is unnecessary and should be removed. "At first" is vague and unnecessary in this context.


Final Edited Text

I've been reminded of my past through the book's topic. Until I got married, I was a violin player in an orchestra. We had to take a performance test in front of the conductor and senior players. It was like a promotion test—if we got a higher score, we moved to the front seat. Otherwise, we moved to the very last seat.

In the worst case, if we didn't get a standard score, we got fired. I was always stressed. I felt so happy when I performed in a concert, but at the same time, I was both nervous and confident.

So after getting married, I quit the orchestra.

 


수강정보
필리핀 전화영어 주 2회 10분 4주
튜터
Anna
교재
New+ Get Up to Speed Situational 2
[시니어] 정규
번호
제목
작성자
튜터
작성일
256
완료
[9번째 영작 첨삭] shopping
jiyeon lee
-
2015.06.25
255
완료
[5번째 영작 첨삭] HI~
pepper
-
2015.06.25
254
완료
[12번째 영작 첨삭] Tired day
RYU
-
2015.06.25
253
완료
[9번째 영작 첨삭] 2015-06-23
KIM YU HEE
-
2015.06.23
252
완료
[8번째 영작 첨삭] workshop
jiyeon lee
-
2015.06.23
251
완료
[7번째 영작 첨삭] I met my friend
jiyeon lee
-
2015.06.23
250
완료
[11번째 영작 첨삭] After 1 month
RYU
-
2015.06.23
249
완료
[8번째 영작 첨삭] one language
sunny
-
2015.06.22
248
완료
[7번째 영작 첨삭] on-line communication
sunny
-
2015.06.22
247
완료
[1번째 영작 첨삭] Lesson 1. 5~8 question
Sinae Kim
-
2015.06.19
246
완료
[6번째 영작 첨삭] Advertising
sunny
-
2015.06.18
245
완료
[6번째 영작 첨삭] diary
jiyeon lee
-
2015.06.18
244
완료
[10번째 영작 첨삭] Back to normal day
RYU
-
2015.06.18
243
완료
[5번째 영작 첨삭] English
sunny
-
2015.06.16
242
완료
[9번째 영작 첨삭] Gloomy Day
RYU
-
2015.06.16
241
완료
[7번째 영작 첨삭] question
KOKANGMIN
-
2015.06.15
240
완료
[4번째 영작 첨삭] to my teacher:)
sunyoung you
-
2015.06.15
239
완료
[8번째 영작 첨삭] Monday
RYU
-
2015.06.15
238
완료
[3번째 영작 첨삭] 20150614
min
-
2015.06.14
237
완료
[4번째 영작 첨삭] Introduction
Jane
-
2015.06.12

초대한 친구가 수업을 등록하면
무료 수업 1회를 드려요!

무료 수업 1회
초대한 친구가 회원 가입 및 수강권 결제 후 수업을 등록하면
두 사람 모두 무료 수업 1회 수강권을 받아요!
Step 01. 조이영어로 친구를 초대해 보세요!
https://joy05.co.kr
Step 02. 인증하기
초대한 친구가 수업 등록을 완료하면, 고객센터로 수업을 등록한 친구의 '아이디' 또는 '이름 + 휴대폰 번호 뒷자리'를 남겨주세요!
*자녀 혹은 학부모 이름으로 가입하신 경우, 실제 회원가입하신 수강생 이름으로 적어주세요!
Ex. 친구 아이디: joy5205 / 친구 이름: 김조이, 9876
Step 03. 혜택받기
고객센터를 통해 인증하신 내용이 확인되면, 혜택을 적용해드립니다!

Zoom 화상수업 가이드

1. Zoom 설치하기
아래 링크에 접속하여 Zoom 프로그램을 설치합니다.
2. 수강실 입장하기
1) 조이영어 홈페이지 로그인 후 강의실에서 [수강실 입장] 버튼을 클릭해주세요.
2) 버튼을 누르고 Zoom 프로그램 열기 허용 → 컴퓨터 오디오로 참가를 누르면 튜터와 연결됩니다.
3. Zoom 이용에 다른 문의사항이 있으신가요?
조이영어 학습매니저에게 연락주시면 수업에 관련된 문의사항을 친절히 상담해드리겠습니다.
  • 카카오톡 상담 채널 : @조이영어
  • 조이영어 고객센터 : 1899-8695 (운영시간 : 월~금 9:00~17:30)

이용약관

개인정보취급방침