영작교정
목록
완료

Diary

We lived in Busan when my son was 5 to 7 ages. We had neighborhood who hang out with. They came to incheon due to attention their family occasions. We talked before we knew that her Cousin's home is next to apartment from my home. We surprised. But they came to here just family 's gathering. So we almost didn't meet each and they didn't have time to meet us. In addition Incheon is so far between each aras when we move. we had close located. even though in a short time we had a good time.

We lived in Busan when my son was 5 to 7 ages. We had neighborhood who hang out with. They came to incheon due to attention their family occasions. We talked before we knew that her Cousin's home is next to apartment from my home. We surprised. But they came to here just family 's gathering. So we almost didn't meet each and they didn't have time to meet us. In addition Incheon is so far between each aras when we move. we had close located. even though in a short time we had a good time.

==================================================================================================================================

HERE ARE THE CORRECTIONS:

  1. "We lived in Busan when my son was 5 to 7 ages."
    Correction: "We lived in Busan when my son was between the ages of 5 and 7."
    Explanation: Use "between the ages of" to express a range of ages. "Ages" needs to be plural here, and the article "the" is necessary for natural phrasing.

  2. "We had neighborhood who hang out with."
    Correction: "We had neighbors to hang out with."
    Explanation: "Neighborhood" refers to an area or community. Since you mean people, the correct word is "neighbors." "To hang out with" fits better than "who hang out with."

  3. "They came to incheon due to attention their family occasions."
    Correction: "They came to Incheon to attend family events."
    Explanation: "Attention" is the wrong word here; "attend" fits the context better. Proper nouns like "Incheon" need capitalization, and "events" is more suitable than "occasions."

  4. "We talked before we knew that her Cousin's home is next to apartment from my home."
    Correction: "We talked and found out that her cousin's home is in the apartment next to mine."
    Explanation: "Before we knew" is unclear, so "talked and found out" clarifies the sequence. "Cousin" does not need capitalization, and "in the apartment next to mine" sounds more natural.

  5. "We surprised."
    Correction: "We were surprised."
    Explanation: Use "were" to form the correct past tense passive construction.

  6. "But they came to here just family 's gathering."
    Correction: "But they only came here for a family gathering."
    Explanation: "Only" fits better in this context, and "a family gathering" is the correct phrase. Avoid unnecessary spaces in possessive forms.

  7. "So we almost didn't meet each and they didn't have time to meet us."
    Correction: "So we almost didn’t meet, and they didn’t have time to meet us."
    Explanation: The conjunctions need proper punctuation. "Each" alone is incorrect—just "us" is sufficient.

  8. "In addition Incheon is so far between each aras when we move."
    Correction: "In addition, Incheon is very spread out, making it difficult to get around."
    Explanation: "Incheon" should be followed by a comma. "Far between" isn't appropriate for locations; "spread out" makes more sense.

  9. "We had close located."
    Correction: "We lived close to each other."
    Explanation: "Close located" is unnatural. "Lived close to each other" fits the context better.

  10. "Even though in a short time we had a good time."
    Correction: "Even though it was brief, we had a good time."
    Explanation: The sentence is more natural with "it was brief" rather than "in a short time."


Final Corrected Text:

We lived in Busan when my son was between the ages of 5 and 7. We had neighbors to hang out with. They came to Incheon to attend family events. We talked and found out that her cousin's home is in the apartment next to mine. We were surprised! But they only came here for a family gathering, so we almost didn’t meet, and they didn’t have time to meet us. In addition, Incheon is very spread out, making it difficult to get around. We lived close to each other back then. Even though it was brief, we had a good time.


수강정보
필리핀 전화영어 주 2회 10분 4주
튜터
Anna
교재
New+ Get Up to Speed Situational 2
[시니어] 정규
번호
제목
작성자
튜터
작성일
3019
완료
[67번째 영작 첨삭] School life
Min
-
2022.06.28
3018
완료
[38번째 영작 첨삭] A pet you want to raise
Eric
Albie
2022.06.28
3017
완료
[57번째 영작 첨삭] Fashion
Soi
Disney
2022.06.28
3016
완료
[56번째 영작 첨삭] School Life
Soi
Disney
2022.06.28
3015
완료
[47번째 영작 첨삭] The meaning of fashion to me
Logan
-
2022.06.28
3014
완료
[29번째 영작 첨삭] A pet that l want to raise
Daniel
Renish~"MWF
2022.06.28
3013
완료
[66번째 영작 첨삭] Special my family
Min
-
2022.06.28
3012
완료
[5번째 영작 첨삭] School life
Fuzzle
Mary Grace
2022.06.28
3011
완료
[46번째 영작 첨삭] Daily school life.
Logan
-
2022.06.28
3010
완료
[45번째 영작 첨삭] Getting a new pet.
Logan
-
2022.06.28
3009
완료
[37번째 영작 첨삭] Special family
Eric
Albie
2022.06.28
3008
완료
[44번째 영작 첨삭] Special my family
Logan
-
2022.06.28
3007
완료
[28번째 영작 첨삭] Why should i dress well?
Daniel
Renish~"MWF
2022.06.28
3006
완료
[55번째 영작 첨삭] A pet that I want to have
Soi
Disney
2022.06.28
3005
완료
[65번째 영작 첨삭] My last weekend
Min
-
2022.06.28
3004
완료
[27번째 영작 첨삭] Shcool life
Daniel
Renish~"MWF
2022.06.28
3003
완료
[4번째 영작 첨삭] Our family
Fuzzle
Mary Grace
2022.06.28
3002
완료
[54번째 영작 첨삭] Special Family
Soi
Disney
2022.06.28
3001
완료
[26번째 영작 첨삭] Special my family
Daniel
Renish~"MWF
2022.06.28
3000
완료
[25번째 영작 첨삭] Special my family
Daniel
Renish~"MWF
2022.06.28

초대한 친구가 수업을 등록하면
무료 수업 1회를 드려요!

무료 수업 1회
초대한 친구가 회원 가입 및 수강권 결제 후 수업을 등록하면
두 사람 모두 무료 수업 1회 수강권을 받아요!
Step 01. 조이영어로 친구를 초대해 보세요!
https://joy05.co.kr
Step 02. 인증하기
초대한 친구가 수업 등록을 완료하면, 고객센터로 수업을 등록한 친구의 '아이디' 또는 '이름 + 휴대폰 번호 뒷자리'를 남겨주세요!
*자녀 혹은 학부모 이름으로 가입하신 경우, 실제 회원가입하신 수강생 이름으로 적어주세요!
Ex. 친구 아이디: joy5205 / 친구 이름: 김조이, 9876
Step 03. 혜택받기
고객센터를 통해 인증하신 내용이 확인되면, 혜택을 적용해드립니다!

Zoom 화상수업 가이드

1. Zoom 설치하기
아래 링크에 접속하여 Zoom 프로그램을 설치합니다.
2. 수강실 입장하기
1) 조이영어 홈페이지 로그인 후 강의실에서 [수강실 입장] 버튼을 클릭해주세요.
2) 버튼을 누르고 Zoom 프로그램 열기 허용 → 컴퓨터 오디오로 참가를 누르면 튜터와 연결됩니다.
3. Zoom 이용에 다른 문의사항이 있으신가요?
조이영어 학습매니저에게 연락주시면 수업에 관련된 문의사항을 친절히 상담해드리겠습니다.
  • 카카오톡 상담 채널 : @조이영어
  • 조이영어 고객센터 : 1899-8695 (운영시간 : 월~금 9:00~17:30)

이용약관

개인정보취급방침