영작교정
목록
완료

Diary

We lived in Hongkong for 3 years. My son was 1- 3years old. We got along playgroups. He called Jon and mom of them were close to us especially. His mom is korean but dad is Canadian.So he speaks English only. After We left to korea and they left to canada, we was contacting
with messages. Surprisingly I got a call they came to korea on vacation. We met for a long time. My son tried to speaks English to talk with him as he can. They played at the kidscaffee. We talked story the past. We thought our baby story

We lived in Hongkong for 3 years. My son was 1- 3years old. We got along playgroups. He called Jon and mom of them were close to us especially. His mom is korean but dad is Canadian.So he speaks English only. After We left to korea and they left to canada, we was contacting with messages. Surprisingly I got a call they came to korea on vacation. We met for a long time. My son tried to speaks English to talk with him as he can. They played at the kidscaffee. We talked story the past. We thought our baby story

================================================================================================================================
 

Corrected Version: We lived in Hong Kong for 3 years. My son was 1 to 3 years old during that time. We joined some playgroups. He became especially close to a boy named Jon and his mom. Jon's mom is Korean, but his dad is Canadian, so Jon only speaks English. After we moved back to Korea and they moved to Canada, we stayed in contact through messages. Surprisingly, I got a call that they were coming to Korea for vacation. We met after a long time. My son tried to speak English to communicate with Jon as best as he could. They played at a kids' cafe, and we reminisced about the past, remembering stories from when our kids were babies.

Here's the corrected version of each sentence with explanations:

  1. We lived in Hongkong for 3 years.

    • Error: "Hongkong" should be written as "Hong Kong" because it’s two words.
    • Correction: We lived in Hong Kong for 3 years.
  2. My son was 1- 3years old.

    • Error: "1- 3years old" needs proper spacing, and it’s better to say "1 to 3 years old."
    • Correction: My son was 1 to 3 years old.
  3. We got along playgroups.

    • Error: The phrase "got along playgroups" is incorrect. "Joined playgroups" or "attended playgroups" would be clearer.
    • Correction: We joined some playgroups.
  4. He called Jon and mom of them were close to us especially.

    • Error: This sentence is unclear. "He called Jon and mom of them" doesn't make sense. It's better to clarify that Jon and his mom became close to you.
    • Correction: He became especially close to a boy named Jon and his mom.
  5. His mom is korean but dad is Canadian.

    • Error: "Korean" should be capitalized, and the sentence needs better structure. It’s more natural to say "but his dad is Canadian."
    • Correction: Jon’s mom is Korean, but his dad is Canadian.
  6. So he speaks English only.

    • Error: The sentence structure is a bit awkward. It’s clearer to say "So Jon only speaks English."
    • Correction: So Jon only speaks English.
  7. After We left to korea and they left to canada, we was contacting with messages.

    • Error: "We left to" should be "we moved back to," and "was contacting" should be "stayed in contact." Both country names need capitalization.
    • Correction: After we moved back to Korea and they moved to Canada, we stayed in contact through messages.
  8. Surprisingly I got a call they came to korea on vacation.

    • Error: The sentence needs better phrasing. "They came to Korea" should be "they were coming to Korea." Also, "Korea" should be capitalized.
    • Correction: Surprisingly, I got a call that they were coming to Korea for vacation.
  9. We met for a long time.

    • Error: "For a long time" is unclear. It’s better to say "after a long time."
    • Correction: We met after a long time.
  10. My son tried to speaks English to talk with him as he can.

    • Error: "Tried to speaks" should be "tried to speak," and "as he can" should be "as best as he could" for proper tense and grammar.
    • Correction: My son tried to speak English to communicate with Jon as best as he could.
  11. They played at the kidscaffee.

    • Error: "Kidscaffee" is misspelled and should be "kids' cafe."
    • Correction: They played at a kids' cafe.
  12. We talked story the past.

    • Error: The phrasing is awkward. It’s better to say "We talked about the past" or "We reminisced about the past."
    • Correction: We reminisced about the past.
  13. We thought our baby story.

    • Error: This sentence is unclear. It should say "We remembered stories from when our kids were babies."
    • Correction: We remembered stories from when our kids were babies.

 

 


수강정보
필리핀 전화영어 주 2회 10분 4주
튜터
Anna
교재
New+ Get Up to Speed Situational 2
[시니어] 정규
번호
제목
작성자
튜터
작성일
5936
완료
[5번째 영작 첨삭] I listen to playing the piano.
Hazin Kim
Berry
2024.04.11
5935
완료
[11번째 영작 첨삭] My Family's Jobs
이상원
Gail
2024.04.11
5934
완료
[1번째 영작 첨삭] Nice to meet you, Melissa:-)
최은정
Melissa
2024.04.10
5933
완료
[46번째 영작 첨삭] play with...
doi
Anabelle
2024.04.10
5932
완료
[1번째 영작 첨삭] fever and cold
cindy
Roselle
2024.04.10
5931
완료
[2번째 영작 첨삭] second class
원정민
Chinnee
2024.04.09
5930
완료
[106번째 영작 첨삭] Bullying
Rachel
Jenica
2024.04.08
5929
완료
[45번째 영작 첨삭] For a long time!
doi
Anabelle
2024.04.08
5928
완료
[101번째 영작 첨삭] Playing soccer with my dad
Oliver
Frans
2024.04.07
5927
완료
[100번째 영작 첨삭] Playing with my friend
Oliver
Frans
2024.04.07
5926
완료
[99번째 영작 첨삭] Watching soccer match
Oliver
Frans
2024.04.07
5925
완료
[98번째 영작 첨삭] English class
Oliver
Frans
2024.04.07
5924
완료
[1번째 영작 첨삭] Dear 00
Juyoung Lee
Alice
2024.04.07
5923
완료
[6번째 영작 첨삭] Festival
권소연
Chrissie
2024.04.06
5922
완료
[1번째 영작 첨삭] I met Krizzy.
Amiee
Krizzy
2024.04.05
5921
완료
[105번째 영작 첨삭] Cheater
Rachel
Jenica
2024.04.05
5920
완료
[4번째 영작 첨삭] Chinese spicy stew, malatang
Hazin Kim
Berry
2024.04.05
5919
완료
[1번째 영작 첨삭] My first class with jinny
원정민
Chinnee
2024.04.04
5918
완료
[5번째 영작 첨삭] Cherry Blossoms
권소연
Chrissie
2024.04.04
5917
완료
[8번째 영작 첨삭] first class
JiHu
Gresha
2024.04.03

초대한 친구가 수업을 등록하면
무료 수업 1회를 드려요!

무료 수업 1회
초대한 친구가 회원 가입 및 수강권 결제 후 수업을 등록하면
두 사람 모두 무료 수업 1회 수강권을 받아요!
Step 01. 조이영어로 친구를 초대해 보세요!
https://joy05.co.kr
Step 02. 인증하기
초대한 친구가 수업 등록을 완료하면, 고객센터로 수업을 등록한 친구의 '아이디' 또는 '이름 + 휴대폰 번호 뒷자리'를 남겨주세요!
*자녀 혹은 학부모 이름으로 가입하신 경우, 실제 회원가입하신 수강생 이름으로 적어주세요!
Ex. 친구 아이디: joy5205 / 친구 이름: 김조이, 9876
Step 03. 혜택받기
고객센터를 통해 인증하신 내용이 확인되면, 혜택을 적용해드립니다!

Zoom 화상수업 가이드

1. Zoom 설치하기
아래 링크에 접속하여 Zoom 프로그램을 설치합니다.
2. 수강실 입장하기
1) 조이영어 홈페이지 로그인 후 강의실에서 [수강실 입장] 버튼을 클릭해주세요.
2) 버튼을 누르고 Zoom 프로그램 열기 허용 → 컴퓨터 오디오로 참가를 누르면 튜터와 연결됩니다.
3. Zoom 이용에 다른 문의사항이 있으신가요?
조이영어 학습매니저에게 연락주시면 수업에 관련된 문의사항을 친절히 상담해드리겠습니다.
  • 카카오톡 상담 채널 : @조이영어
  • 조이영어 고객센터 : 1899-8695 (운영시간 : 월~금 9:00~17:30)

이용약관

개인정보취급방침