영작교정
목록
완료

My diary

We had talk time about how care for my son with husband. I have olny one son but sometimes I confuse treat way I doing to him right or not. He gets annoyed me I get to scream to him too. I didn't clam down him. I can't stand to disobey to me and break our promises little thing. I thougt whetever or not I force to him to do planed schedule made me. I 've reflected to giving stress him every night. I am sorry to him.So I am trying to some relax and finding another new habit for refresh.

We had talk time about how care for my son with husband. I have olny one son but sometimes I confuse treat way I doing to him right or not. He gets annoyed me I get to scream to him too. I didn't clam down him. I can't stand to disobey to me and break our promises little thing. I thougt whetever or not I force to him to do planed schedule made me. I 've reflected to giving stress him every night. I am sorry to him.So I am trying to some relax and finding another new habit for refresh.


CORRECTIONS:

Original: "We had talk time about how care for my son with husband."

Correction: "We had a discussion about how to care for our son."

Explanation: The phrase "talk time" is informal, so I replaced it with "discussion," which sounds more appropriate in this context. I also changed "my son with husband" to "our son" to reflect the shared responsibility between both parents.

Original: "I have olny one son but sometimes I confuse treat way I doing to him right or not."

Correction: "I have only one son, but sometimes I am unsure if the way I treat him is right or not."

Explanation: "Olny" was corrected to "only," and "confuse" was changed to "unsure" to convey uncertainty more clearly. I also restructured the sentence for clarity.

Original: "He gets annoyed me I get to scream to him too."

Correction: "He gets annoyed with me, and I end up yelling at him."

Explanation: I added "with" after "annoyed" for grammatical accuracy and changed "scream to" to "yelling at" to make the sentence sound more natural.

Original: "I didn't clam down him."

Correction: "I couldn't calm him down."

Explanation: "Clam" was corrected to "calm," and the sentence was rephrased to use the correct verb tense and structure.

Original: "I can't stand to disobey to me and break our promises little thing."

Correction: "I can't tolerate it when he disobeys me or breaks even small promises."

Explanation: The phrase "can't stand" was kept, but "disobey to me" was corrected to "disobeys me" for grammatical accuracy. I also restructured the sentence to be clearer and more concise.

Original: "I thougt whetever or not I force to him to do planed schedule made me."

Correction: "I wondered whether I was forcing him to follow a schedule I created."

Explanation: "Thougt" was corrected to "wondered," "whetever or not" to "whether," and "planed schedule made me" to "a schedule I created." This makes the sentence more coherent and grammatically correct.

Original: "I 've reflected to giving stress him every night. I am sorry to him."

Correction: "I've reflected on the stress I cause him every night, and I feel sorry for him."

Explanation: I changed "reflected to" to "reflected on" to match the correct preposition usage. The phrase "giving stress him" was rephrased to "the stress I cause him" for clarity and correctness.

Original: "So I am trying to some relax and finding another new habit for refresh."

Correction: "So I am trying to relax and find new habits to refresh myself."

Explanation: I rephrased "trying to some relax" to "trying to relax" for grammatical accuracy and made "finding another new habit for refresh" clearer by rephrasing it as "find new habits to refresh myself.

REVISED TEXT:

We had a discussion about how to care for our son. I have only one son, but sometimes I am unsure if the way I treat him is right or not. He gets annoyed with me, and I end up yelling at him. I couldn't calm him down. I can't tolerate it when he disobeys me or breaks even small promises. I wondered whether I was forcing him to follow a schedule I created. I've reflected on the stress I cause him every night, and I feel sorry for him. So I am trying to relax and find new habits to refresh myself. 



 


수강정보
필리핀 전화영어 주 2회 10분 12주
튜터
Anna
교재
New+ Get Up to Speed Situational 1
[시니어] 정규
번호
제목
작성자
튜터
작성일
3919
완료
[7번째 영작 첨삭] C.H.I.L.D.I.S.H Dad
Lia
Mary Grace
2023.01.12
3918
완료
[1번째 영작 첨삭] My first english diay
wendy
Hella
2023.01.12
3917
완료
[1번째 영작 첨삭] The Tale of Despereaux(Part 1)
-
Edleth
2023.01.12
3916
완료
[1번째 영작 첨삭] First dairy
Park-Ha-Sun
-
2023.01.12
3915
완료
[14번째 영작 첨삭] Sushi
lim su hyun
-
2023.01.12
3914
완료
[23번째 영작 첨삭] Doing P.E. at the Classroom 6
Richard
Jana
2023.01.12
3913
완료
[1번째 영작 첨삭] My new year resolusion
Charles
Kimmy
2023.01.12
3912
완료
[6번째 영작 첨삭] Do you believe Santa?
Lia
Mary Grace
2023.01.11
3911
완료
[82번째 영작 첨삭] About studying.
Aiden
CM
2023.01.11
3910
완료
[1번째 영작 첨삭] 23.01.11
Yu juri
Shyla
2023.01.11
3909
완료
[1번째 영작 첨삭] Cannabis
Chris
Sheena
2023.01.11
3908
완료
[1번째 영작 첨삭] positive thinking
Woojoon
Daniella
2023.01.11
3907
완료
[21번째 영작 첨삭] The sound of birds twitter
EUNMI PARK
Maribel
2023.01.11
3906
완료
[20번째 영작 첨삭] Dolphin
EUNMI PARK
Maribel
2023.01.11
3905
완료
[7번째 영작 첨삭] milk
Lee eun ser
-
2023.01.11
3904
완료
[1번째 영작 첨삭] About Me
Christina
Mary Grace
2023.01.10
3903
완료
[3번째 영작 첨삭] My day turned into happiness.
min-sung
-
2023.01.10
3902
완료
[1번째 영작 첨삭] My cute turtle.
Lotty
Linda
2023.01.10
3901
완료
[4번째 영작 첨삭] My plan is...
Elena
Karen
2023.01.10
3900
완료
[5번째 영작 첨삭] Working at "Itaewon"(2)
Yeonsik
-
2023.01.10

초대한 친구가 수업을 등록하면
무료 수업 1회를 드려요!

무료 수업 1회
초대한 친구가 회원 가입 및 수강권 결제 후 수업을 등록하면
두 사람 모두 무료 수업 1회 수강권을 받아요!
Step 01. 조이영어로 친구를 초대해 보세요!
https://joy05.co.kr
Step 02. 인증하기
초대한 친구가 수업 등록을 완료하면, 고객센터로 수업을 등록한 친구의 '아이디' 또는 '이름 + 휴대폰 번호 뒷자리'를 남겨주세요!
*자녀 혹은 학부모 이름으로 가입하신 경우, 실제 회원가입하신 수강생 이름으로 적어주세요!
Ex. 친구 아이디: joy5205 / 친구 이름: 김조이, 9876
Step 03. 혜택받기
고객센터를 통해 인증하신 내용이 확인되면, 혜택을 적용해드립니다!

Zoom 화상수업 가이드

1. Zoom 설치하기
아래 링크에 접속하여 Zoom 프로그램을 설치합니다.
2. 수강실 입장하기
1) 조이영어 홈페이지 로그인 후 강의실에서 [수강실 입장] 버튼을 클릭해주세요.
2) 버튼을 누르고 Zoom 프로그램 열기 허용 → 컴퓨터 오디오로 참가를 누르면 튜터와 연결됩니다.
3. Zoom 이용에 다른 문의사항이 있으신가요?
조이영어 학습매니저에게 연락주시면 수업에 관련된 문의사항을 친절히 상담해드리겠습니다.
  • 카카오톡 상담 채널 : @조이영어
  • 조이영어 고객센터 : 1899-8695 (운영시간 : 월~금 9:00~17:30)

이용약관

개인정보취급방침