영작교정
목록
완료

8/10

My family visited the valley again. I was buying a new water gun, but I took another one from home instead. I used it when we had a water fight with my dad, but it was weak compared to him because he threw water very strongly at me. I looked for and observed the marsh snails with my mom. This time, the water goggles broke, and I thought I would buy them next time. We had a great time eating dinner at a delicious pork cutlet restaurant.

My family visited the valley again. I was buying a new water gun, but I took another one from home instead. I used it when we had a water fight with my dad, but it was weak compared to him because he threw water very strongly at me. I looked for and observed the marsh snails with my mom. This time, the water goggles broke, and I thought I would buy them next time. We had a great time eating dinner at a delicious pork cutlet restaurant.

Here are the corrected sentences with explanations:
 
Original: My family visited the valley again.
Correction: My family visited the valley again.
Explanation: The sentence is already correct.
 
Original: I was buying a new water gun, but I took another one from home instead.
Correction: I was going to buy a new water gun, but I took one from home instead.
Explanation: "Going to buy" is more accurate than "was buying" since the purchase did not happen.
 
Original: I used it when we had a water fight with my dad, but it was weak compared to him because he threw water very strongly at me.
Correction: I used it when we had a water fight with my dad, but it was weak compared to his because he threw water very strongly at me.
Explanation: "Compared to him" should be "compared to his" to refer to the dad's water gun. The sentence is clearer this way.
 
Original: I looked for and observed the marsh snails with my mom.
Correction: I looked for and observed marsh snails with my mom.
Explanation: "The" is unnecessary before "marsh snails."
 
Original: This time, the water goggles broke, and I thought I would buy them next time.
Correction: This time, the water goggles broke, so I decided to buy a new pair next time.
Explanation: "Decided" is stronger than "thought," and "a new pair" is clearer than "them."
 
Original: We had a great time eating dinner at a delicious pork cutlet restaurant.
Correction: We had a great time eating dinner at a delicious pork cutlet restaurant.
Explanation: The sentence is correct.

REVISED TEXT:
 
My family visited the valley again. I was going to buy a new water gun, but I took one from home instead. I used it when we had a water fight with my dad, but it was weak compared to his because he threw water very strongly at me. I looked for and observed marsh snails with my mom. This time, the water goggles broke, so I decided to buy a new pair next time. We had a great time eating dinner at a delicious pork cutlet restaurant.
 

수강정보
필리핀 전화영어 주 2회 10분 24주
튜터
Anna
교재
Hand in Hand 3
[주니어] 정규
번호
제목
작성자
튜터
작성일
3179
완료
[214번째 영작 첨삭] script-Places
sukyung Kim
Melissa
2022.07.26
3178
완료
[213번째 영작 첨삭] script-Shopping
sukyung Kim
Melissa
2022.07.26
3177
완료
[2번째 영작 첨삭] A little lonely my day....
Jessica
Jana
2022.07.26
3176
완료
[1번째 영작 첨삭] gvvh
Jessica
Jana
2022.07.26
3175
완료
[17번째 영작 첨삭] Camping
dominicus
-
2022.07.26
3174
완료
[1번째 영작 첨삭] I hava a question.
Kay
Kath"~☎
2022.07.26
3173
완료
[1번째 영작 첨삭] Like
won
Michelle
2022.07.26
3172
완료
[2번째 영작 첨삭] What happened this weekend #2
Henry
-
2022.07.26
3171
완료
[1번째 영작 첨삭] What happened this weekend #1
Henry
-
2022.07.26
3170
완료
[212번째 영작 첨삭] script-Shopping
sukyung Kim
Melissa
2022.07.25
3169
완료
[211번째 영작 첨삭] script-Shopping
sukyung Kim
Melissa
2022.07.25
3168
완료
[25번째 영작 첨삭] Shopping
Fuzzle
-
2022.07.25
3167
완료
[24번째 영작 첨삭] Camp
Fuzzle
-
2022.07.25
3166
완료
[23번째 영작 첨삭] Pool
Fuzzle
-
2022.07.25
3165
완료
[1번째 영작 첨삭] My Favourite Books: Warriors
Ann
Rose
2022.07.25
3164
완료
[4번째 영작 첨삭] Hot sumner
Yun
Melissa
2022.07.25
3163
완료
[8번째 영작 첨삭] Pajama party
Chloe
-
2022.07.24
3162
완료
[7번째 영작 첨삭] Pajama party
Chloe
-
2022.07.24
3161
완료
[10번째 영작 첨삭] water park
sea
Disney
2022.07.24
3160
완료
[3번째 영작 첨삭] My weekend
Yun
Melissa
2022.07.24

초대한 친구가 수업을 등록하면
무료 수업 1회를 드려요!

무료 수업 1회
초대한 친구가 회원 가입 및 수강권 결제 후 수업을 등록하면
두 사람 모두 무료 수업 1회 수강권을 받아요!
Step 01. 조이영어로 친구를 초대해 보세요!
https://joy05.co.kr
Step 02. 인증하기
초대한 친구가 수업 등록을 완료하면, 고객센터로 수업을 등록한 친구의 '아이디' 또는 '이름 + 휴대폰 번호 뒷자리'를 남겨주세요!
*자녀 혹은 학부모 이름으로 가입하신 경우, 실제 회원가입하신 수강생 이름으로 적어주세요!
Ex. 친구 아이디: joy5205 / 친구 이름: 김조이, 9876
Step 03. 혜택받기
고객센터를 통해 인증하신 내용이 확인되면, 혜택을 적용해드립니다!

Zoom 화상수업 가이드

1. Zoom 설치하기
아래 링크에 접속하여 Zoom 프로그램을 설치합니다.
2. 수강실 입장하기
1) 조이영어 홈페이지 로그인 후 강의실에서 [수강실 입장] 버튼을 클릭해주세요.
2) 버튼을 누르고 Zoom 프로그램 열기 허용 → 컴퓨터 오디오로 참가를 누르면 튜터와 연결됩니다.
3. Zoom 이용에 다른 문의사항이 있으신가요?
조이영어 학습매니저에게 연락주시면 수업에 관련된 문의사항을 친절히 상담해드리겠습니다.
  • 카카오톡 상담 채널 : @조이영어
  • 조이영어 고객센터 : 1899-8695 (운영시간 : 월~금 9:00~17:30)

이용약관

개인정보취급방침