영작교정
목록
완료

I really appreciate your help, Charm

Could you correct this effectively? If it is possible, please change it to make it easier to talk. T0T
And could you give me some phrases about introduction and ending part that we talked about today ?
I will be able to memorize them. ^^ Thank you so much for your help!!

I often feel like many different thoughts and feelings are shaking in me and I reflect on them, and it feels like I’m lost in my thoughts. The thoughts are about me, especially my future direction, and my family and friends. So I tried to describe shaking thoughts as swimming fish in a colorful way to highlight diversity and dynamics and that' why the word in the title is called the lake. I also think the constantly chaning thoughts and feelings were as transparent as the scales of the fish so I expressed the transparent feelings in watercolor painting. I drew myself with a tried, weary expression and expressed my thoughtful, quiet appearance in a static tone through drawing in black and white oriental tone. As I am in my mind, I descibed myself as sitting in an abstract space using the features of watercolor painting rather than any particular background. But by placing dynamic graphic form with dry brush to the background, I enhance the feeling of shaking.

Could you correct this effectively? If it is possible, please change it to make it easier for me to say it. T0T.
And, could you give me some phrases about the introduction and ending part that we talked about today? 
I will be able to memorize them. ^^ Thank you so much for your help!! 

I often feel like that my emotions are shaking inside of me and I tried to reflect on them. It feels like that I am always lost in my own thoughts. They are all about me, especially my future, my family and my friends. I tried to describe them like the fish swimming in a colorful way to highlight dynamic diversity, that’s why I called it “the lake”. I also think that the constant changing of my thoughts and emotions are as transparent as the scales of the fish so I expressed these feelings in a watercolor painting. I drew myself with a tired weary expression. It also showed my thoughtful quiet appearance through drawing in black and white using static and oriental tone. As I picture in my mind, I described myself as the person who is sitting in an abstract space using the features of the watercolor paint rather than any particular background. By placing the dynamic graphics with the use of the dry brush to the background, it enhanced my shaken emotions.

**hello Juhui, I put everything what you were trying to say in here, let me know if there are things you wanted to add. There are also some parts I don't understand so I will be asking you about them tomorrow. See you!


수강정보
필리핀 화상영어 주 5회 30분 8주
교재
side by side 2 (Junior course)
번호
제목
작성자
튜터
작성일
6236
완료
[11번째 영작 첨삭] My Favorite Foods
Jemin
South
2024.08.05
6235
완료
[150번째 영작 첨삭] Watch soccer match
Oliver
Frans
2024.08.04
6234
완료
[149번째 영작 첨삭] Go to english camp
Oliver
Frans
2024.08.04
6233
완료
[148번째 영작 첨삭] Playing with friend
Oliver
Frans
2024.08.04
6232
완료
[147번째 영작 첨삭] Riding bike with friend and dad
Oliver
Frans
2024.08.04
6231
완료
[46번째 영작 첨삭] The origamy
David
Rainbow
2024.08.03
6230
완료
[11번째 영작 첨삭] Birthday party
유미
Janine
2024.08.03
6229
완료
[129번째 영작 첨삭] Foreign visitors.
Rachel
Bel
2024.08.02
6228
완료
[2번째 영작 첨삭] It's okay
A RIM SONG
South
2024.08.02
6227
완료
[14번째 영작 첨삭] My best friend
JiHu
Gresha
2024.08.02
6226
완료
[3번째 영작 첨삭] Friday Aug.2 2024 Jason
Jason Kwon
Pia
2024.08.02
6225
완료
[2번째 영작 첨삭] Friday Aug.2 2024 Jason
Jason Kwon
Pia
2024.08.02
6224
완료
[1번째 영작 첨삭] tremporlen
kim bo min
Sydelle
2024.08.02
6223
완료
[2번째 영작 첨삭] Suggestions
Jay
Norriel
2024.08.02
6222
완료
[1번째 영작 첨삭] Suggestions
Jay
Norriel
2024.08.02
6221
완료
[27번째 영작 첨삭] Thank you for your correction
Min
Mary
2024.08.02
6220
완료
[2번째 영작 첨삭] studying english is
김혜진
Gwen
2024.08.01
6219
완료
[13번째 영작 첨삭] My ldvely family
JiHu
Gresha
2024.08.01
6218
완료
[12번째 영작 첨삭] My lovely family
JiHu
Gresha
2024.08.01
6217
완료
[26번째 영작 첨삭] 7/31-2
Min
Mary
2024.08.01

초대한 친구가 수업을 등록하면
무료 수업 1회를 드려요!

무료 수업 1회
초대한 친구가 회원 가입 및 수강권 결제 후 수업을 등록하면
두 사람 모두 무료 수업 1회 수강권을 받아요!
Step 01. 조이영어로 친구를 초대해 보세요!
https://joy05.co.kr
Step 02. 인증하기
초대한 친구가 수업 등록을 완료하면, 고객센터로 수업을 등록한 친구의 '아이디' 또는 '이름 + 휴대폰 번호 뒷자리'를 남겨주세요!
*자녀 혹은 학부모 이름으로 가입하신 경우, 실제 회원가입하신 수강생 이름으로 적어주세요!
Ex. 친구 아이디: joy5205 / 친구 이름: 김조이, 9876
Step 03. 혜택받기
고객센터를 통해 인증하신 내용이 확인되면, 혜택을 적용해드립니다!

Zoom 화상수업 가이드

1. Zoom 설치하기
아래 링크에 접속하여 Zoom 프로그램을 설치합니다.
2. 수강실 입장하기
1) 조이영어 홈페이지 로그인 후 강의실에서 [수강실 입장] 버튼을 클릭해주세요.
2) 버튼을 누르고 Zoom 프로그램 열기 허용 → 컴퓨터 오디오로 참가를 누르면 튜터와 연결됩니다.
3. Zoom 이용에 다른 문의사항이 있으신가요?
조이영어 학습매니저에게 연락주시면 수업에 관련된 문의사항을 친절히 상담해드리겠습니다.
  • 카카오톡 상담 채널 : @조이영어
  • 조이영어 고객센터 : 1899-8695 (운영시간 : 월~금 9:00~17:30)

이용약관

개인정보취급방침