영작교정
목록
완료

I really appreciate your help, Charm

Could you correct this effectively? If it is possible, please change it to make it easier to talk. T0T
And could you give me some phrases about introduction and ending part that we talked about today ?
I will be able to memorize them. ^^ Thank you so much for your help!!

I often feel like many different thoughts and feelings are shaking in me and I reflect on them, and it feels like I’m lost in my thoughts. The thoughts are about me, especially my future direction, and my family and friends. So I tried to describe shaking thoughts as swimming fish in a colorful way to highlight diversity and dynamics and that' why the word in the title is called the lake. I also think the constantly chaning thoughts and feelings were as transparent as the scales of the fish so I expressed the transparent feelings in watercolor painting. I drew myself with a tried, weary expression and expressed my thoughtful, quiet appearance in a static tone through drawing in black and white oriental tone. As I am in my mind, I descibed myself as sitting in an abstract space using the features of watercolor painting rather than any particular background. But by placing dynamic graphic form with dry brush to the background, I enhance the feeling of shaking.

Could you correct this effectively? If it is possible, please change it to make it easier for me to say it. T0T.
And, could you give me some phrases about the introduction and ending part that we talked about today? 
I will be able to memorize them. ^^ Thank you so much for your help!! 

I often feel like that my emotions are shaking inside of me and I tried to reflect on them. It feels like that I am always lost in my own thoughts. They are all about me, especially my future, my family and my friends. I tried to describe them like the fish swimming in a colorful way to highlight dynamic diversity, that’s why I called it “the lake”. I also think that the constant changing of my thoughts and emotions are as transparent as the scales of the fish so I expressed these feelings in a watercolor painting. I drew myself with a tired weary expression. It also showed my thoughtful quiet appearance through drawing in black and white using static and oriental tone. As I picture in my mind, I described myself as the person who is sitting in an abstract space using the features of the watercolor paint rather than any particular background. By placing the dynamic graphics with the use of the dry brush to the background, it enhanced my shaken emotions.

**hello Juhui, I put everything what you were trying to say in here, let me know if there are things you wanted to add. There are also some parts I don't understand so I will be asking you about them tomorrow. See you!


수강정보
필리핀 화상영어 주 5회 30분 8주
교재
side by side 2 (Junior course)
번호
제목
작성자
튜터
작성일
3919
완료
[7번째 영작 첨삭] C.H.I.L.D.I.S.H Dad
Lia
Mary Grace
2023.01.12
3918
완료
[1번째 영작 첨삭] My first english diay
wendy
Hella
2023.01.12
3917
완료
[1번째 영작 첨삭] The Tale of Despereaux(Part 1)
-
Edleth
2023.01.12
3916
완료
[1번째 영작 첨삭] First dairy
Park-Ha-Sun
-
2023.01.12
3915
완료
[14번째 영작 첨삭] Sushi
lim su hyun
-
2023.01.12
3914
완료
[23번째 영작 첨삭] Doing P.E. at the Classroom 6
Richard
Jana
2023.01.12
3913
완료
[1번째 영작 첨삭] My new year resolusion
Charles
Kimmy
2023.01.12
3912
완료
[6번째 영작 첨삭] Do you believe Santa?
Lia
Mary Grace
2023.01.11
3911
완료
[82번째 영작 첨삭] About studying.
Aiden
CM
2023.01.11
3910
완료
[1번째 영작 첨삭] 23.01.11
Yu juri
Shyla
2023.01.11
3909
완료
[1번째 영작 첨삭] Cannabis
Chris
Sheena
2023.01.11
3908
완료
[1번째 영작 첨삭] positive thinking
Woojoon
Daniella
2023.01.11
3907
완료
[21번째 영작 첨삭] The sound of birds twitter
EUNMI PARK
Maribel
2023.01.11
3906
완료
[20번째 영작 첨삭] Dolphin
EUNMI PARK
Maribel
2023.01.11
3905
완료
[7번째 영작 첨삭] milk
Lee eun ser
-
2023.01.11
3904
완료
[1번째 영작 첨삭] About Me
Christina
Mary Grace
2023.01.10
3903
완료
[3번째 영작 첨삭] My day turned into happiness.
min-sung
-
2023.01.10
3902
완료
[1번째 영작 첨삭] My cute turtle.
Lotty
Linda
2023.01.10
3901
완료
[4번째 영작 첨삭] My plan is...
Elena
Karen
2023.01.10
3900
완료
[5번째 영작 첨삭] Working at "Itaewon"(2)
Yeonsik
-
2023.01.10

초대한 친구가 수업을 등록하면
무료 수업 1회를 드려요!

무료 수업 1회
초대한 친구가 회원 가입 및 수강권 결제 후 수업을 등록하면
두 사람 모두 무료 수업 1회 수강권을 받아요!
Step 01. 조이영어로 친구를 초대해 보세요!
https://joy05.co.kr
Step 02. 인증하기
초대한 친구가 수업 등록을 완료하면, 고객센터로 수업을 등록한 친구의 '아이디' 또는 '이름 + 휴대폰 번호 뒷자리'를 남겨주세요!
*자녀 혹은 학부모 이름으로 가입하신 경우, 실제 회원가입하신 수강생 이름으로 적어주세요!
Ex. 친구 아이디: joy5205 / 친구 이름: 김조이, 9876
Step 03. 혜택받기
고객센터를 통해 인증하신 내용이 확인되면, 혜택을 적용해드립니다!

Zoom 화상수업 가이드

1. Zoom 설치하기
아래 링크에 접속하여 Zoom 프로그램을 설치합니다.
2. 수강실 입장하기
1) 조이영어 홈페이지 로그인 후 강의실에서 [수강실 입장] 버튼을 클릭해주세요.
2) 버튼을 누르고 Zoom 프로그램 열기 허용 → 컴퓨터 오디오로 참가를 누르면 튜터와 연결됩니다.
3. Zoom 이용에 다른 문의사항이 있으신가요?
조이영어 학습매니저에게 연락주시면 수업에 관련된 문의사항을 친절히 상담해드리겠습니다.
  • 카카오톡 상담 채널 : @조이영어
  • 조이영어 고객센터 : 1899-8695 (운영시간 : 월~금 9:00~17:30)

이용약관

개인정보취급방침