영작교정
목록
완료

Jick. Please edit my ielts Task2. Thanks.(1)

As progressing scientific technology about the quality of people’s life also would have been better to these days. And the technology of genetics has been developed. However, as a result of developed technology, there have been the arguments about genetics such as genetic make-up to have better human whether genetics and genetic therapy are really helpful for human beings or not technologically and ethically.
In my opinion, I have the positive opinion on genetics because I believe that it will help us cure diseases.
It is argued by those who oppose genetics and gene therapy that trying to change genetic make-up in order to heal the diseases could well have unwilling side-effects and it will cause other serious diseases. We, however, should be aware of the fact that developing all medicines has so many risks on side effects we can’t know and the experts who develop new ways consider the probability that the side effect takes place and try to prevent people from these kinds of side effects.

As progressing scientific technology about the quality of people’s life also would have been better to these days. And the technology of genetics has been developed. However, as a result of developed technology, there have been the arguments about genetics such as genetic [make-up>misused word it should be makeup=the way in which someone or something is composed] to have better human whether genetics and genetic therapy are really helpful for human beings or not technologically and ethically.
In my opinion, I have the positive opinion on genetics because I believe that it will help us cure diseases.
It is argued by those who oppose genetics and gene therapy that trying to change genetic [make-up>misused word it should be makeup=the way in which someone or something is composed]in order to heal the diseases could well have unwilling side-effects and it will cause other serious diseases. We, however, should be aware of the fact that developing all medicines has so many risks [on> wrong preposition it shoulf be " of"] side effects we can’t know and the experts who develop new ways consider the probability that the side effect takes place and try to prevent people from these kinds of side effects.

Hi~

Kevin:)

 


수강정보
필리핀 화상영어 주 2회 30분 8주
교재
JE TOEIC Speaking
번호
제목
작성자
튜터
작성일
5759
완료
[2번째 영작 첨삭] play tennis
JiHu
-
2024.02.21
5758
접수
[1번째 영작 첨삭] Today is sad.
Sophia
-
2024.02.21
5757
완료
[5번째 영작 첨삭] Korean food.
onyoo
Saphyre
2024.02.21
5756
완료
[1번째 영작 첨삭] First English class
JiHu
-
2024.02.20
5755
접수
[7번째 영작 첨삭] piano
Lynn
-
2024.02.20
5754
접수
[1번째 영작 첨삭] Sorry, teacher.
Ji yul, hwang
-
2024.02.20
5753
완료
[77번째 영작 첨삭] Eating gimbap
-
Hyenna
2024.02.20
5752
완료
[76번째 영작 첨삭] My dad's birthday
-
Hyenna
2024.02.20
5751
완료
[94번째 영작 첨삭] Life
Rachel
Jenica
2024.02.19
5750
접수
[1번째 영작 첨삭] 13 PATTERNS LIGHT
AnJaeho
-
2024.02.19
5749
완료
[32번째 영작 첨삭] The best dessert
Jay
Garlie
2024.02.19
5748
완료
[32번째 영작 첨삭] City streets
David
Rainbow
2024.02.19
5747
완료
[31번째 영작 첨삭] My birthday
David
Rainbow
2024.02.19
5746
완료
[1번째 영작 첨삭] Whatcanwedotoprotect theOcean?
Noah
Tee
2024.02.18
5745
완료
[93번째 영작 첨삭] Fake goods
Rachel
Jenica
2024.02.16
5744
완료
[31번째 영작 첨삭] I can`t wait
Jay
Garlie
2024.02.16
5743
완료
[75번째 영작 첨삭] Watching soccer match
-
Hyenna
2024.02.16
5742
완료
[74번째 영작 첨삭] Nintendo
-
Hyenna
2024.02.15
5741
완료
[30번째 영작 첨삭] I`m feeling very happy
Jay
Garlie
2024.02.14
5740
완료
[4번째 영작 첨삭] My hobby
onyoo
Saphyre
2024.02.14

초대한 친구가 수업을 등록하면
무료 수업 1회를 드려요!

무료 수업 1회
초대한 친구가 회원 가입 및 수강권 결제 후 수업을 등록하면
두 사람 모두 무료 수업 1회 수강권을 받아요!
Step 01. 조이영어로 친구를 초대해 보세요!
https://joy05.co.kr
Step 02. 인증하기
초대한 친구가 수업 등록을 완료하면, 고객센터로 수업을 등록한 친구의 '아이디' 또는 '이름 + 휴대폰 번호 뒷자리'를 남겨주세요!
*자녀 혹은 학부모 이름으로 가입하신 경우, 실제 회원가입하신 수강생 이름으로 적어주세요!
Ex. 친구 아이디: joy5205 / 친구 이름: 김조이, 9876
Step 03. 혜택받기
고객센터를 통해 인증하신 내용이 확인되면, 혜택을 적용해드립니다!

Zoom 화상수업 가이드

1. Zoom 설치하기
아래 링크에 접속하여 Zoom 프로그램을 설치합니다.
2. 수강실 입장하기
1) 조이영어 홈페이지 로그인 후 강의실에서 [수강실 입장] 버튼을 클릭해주세요.
2) 버튼을 누르고 Zoom 프로그램 열기 허용 → 컴퓨터 오디오로 참가를 누르면 튜터와 연결됩니다.
3. Zoom 이용에 다른 문의사항이 있으신가요?
조이영어 학습매니저에게 연락주시면 수업에 관련된 문의사항을 친절히 상담해드리겠습니다.
  • 카카오톡 상담 채널 : @조이영어
  • 조이영어 고객센터 : 1899-8695 (운영시간 : 월~금 9:00~17:30)

이용약관

개인정보취급방침