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Jick. Please edit my ielts Task2. Thanks.(1)

As progressing scientific technology about the quality of people’s life also would have been better to these days. And the technology of genetics has been developed. However, as a result of developed technology, there have been the arguments about genetics such as genetic make-up to have better human whether genetics and genetic therapy are really helpful for human beings or not technologically and ethically.
In my opinion, I have the positive opinion on genetics because I believe that it will help us cure diseases.
It is argued by those who oppose genetics and gene therapy that trying to change genetic make-up in order to heal the diseases could well have unwilling side-effects and it will cause other serious diseases. We, however, should be aware of the fact that developing all medicines has so many risks on side effects we can’t know and the experts who develop new ways consider the probability that the side effect takes place and try to prevent people from these kinds of side effects.

As progressing scientific technology about the quality of people’s life also would have been better to these days. And the technology of genetics has been developed. However, as a result of developed technology, there have been the arguments about genetics such as genetic [make-up>misused word it should be makeup=the way in which someone or something is composed] to have better human whether genetics and genetic therapy are really helpful for human beings or not technologically and ethically.
In my opinion, I have the positive opinion on genetics because I believe that it will help us cure diseases.
It is argued by those who oppose genetics and gene therapy that trying to change genetic [make-up>misused word it should be makeup=the way in which someone or something is composed]in order to heal the diseases could well have unwilling side-effects and it will cause other serious diseases. We, however, should be aware of the fact that developing all medicines has so many risks [on> wrong preposition it shoulf be " of"] side effects we can’t know and the experts who develop new ways consider the probability that the side effect takes place and try to prevent people from these kinds of side effects.

Hi~

Kevin:)

 


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